5 years ago... Part I
MS Quarter Check-In Update
Call a loved one.
Where is your heart?
A few months ago our minister shared; “You're the average of the five people spend the most time with.” This wasn't the first time I heard the quote, but have been spending much time reflecting on the quote. Who is getting the best part of me? Are "my people" getting what they need from me? Am I bringing out the best in those around me?
For those of you that have followed my blog you know the last post was in July.... why? To be honest I really don't know... The focus moved to the farm, navigating a new season without graduate school, and getting much needed rest.... 6 months later I am back. God began pulling on my heart in September, but ignored the tug... yes, I love God and yes I am human....
For the next few posts I am going to be sharing and challenging you to look at the five people you spend the most time with... Sometimes the people we want to spend the most time with don't make the list due to work, schedules, etc....
My Top 5 People:
Being in two buildings, having three bosses, and two staffs.... makes it hard for there to be a person I see or speak to every single day.... I'm learning that is why I feel disconnected from those I want to be connected with.
Make your list:)
I’m not ready...
It’s okay to not be okay. This week was an emotional roller coaster for several big reasons. Four years ago, I was holding Madison in the transplant unit trusting God’s will for her life, one year ago; burying my grandma, counselor, and friend, six days ago praying over my dad that his heart would be strong enough to make it to Springfield and God’s light to shine bright in all, and three days ago bringing some of my childhood things home from grandma’s basement.
Now what? If a masters in counseling has taught me one thing “it’s love yourself enough to extend grace to yourself.” Often we set goals and unrealistic expectations for ourselves & it’s okay to say, “I’m not ready!” Coming from a person who takes pride in finishing projects early, tasks before they’ve been assigned, and being a few steps ahead... I’m giving myself grace to say I’m not ready.
Losing grandma has been hard and painful. Regardless of the amazing 84 years she had on this earth we miss her. We miss her hugs, greetings at the door, presence, how she put peanut butter on our toast, and always knew what to say or facial expression to share when life was scary, disappointing, or joyful.
I’m not ready for her things to be moved or the house to be rearranged. Regardless of how silly that may sound; grandma spent most of her life in that home... making sure it was welcoming and ready for the next person who walked in the door.
The reality is regardless of what I am ready for change will come. For today I will spend time getting myself ready for that change.
In what area of your life do you need to extend grace to yourself?